With the venue only announced to internerds on the day of the show, Monday’s ‘secret’ encore performance by Rhode Island duo Lightning Bolt – who had played the much bigger Manning Bar across the road on Saturday night – caught a few folks off-guard, not least the chief organiser/support act.

When Hermann’s doors opened at the whispered time of 7pm, the tour party was still on route from Brisbane after the previous evening’s Lightning Bolt / Primitive Calculators / Grey Daturas gig. As such, Robert McManus (tour promoter and member of Grey Daturas) was screaming southbound along the Pacific Highway when he should have been onstage opening the show under his solo noise guise, Black Widow. So, completely by default, the evening’s cherry-popping duties fell to Rice屎Corpse.

Rice屎Corpse is Justice Yeldham (aka Lucas Abela) re-contextualising his trademark glass-blowing noise act as a heavy freeform experimental trio. Originally a collaboration with a pair of talented Chinamen done as part of a ‘cultural exchange’ (that’s what it needs to be called or else the Government won’t give you any grant $$$, y’see), for local shows Lucas is backed by skin beating supremo Peter Kostic (Front End Loader, Hard-Ons, Regurgitator) and key-mashing organist Stuart Olsen (Mothra, Rand & Holland, Garbage & The Flowers).

Carrying less threat of blood spillage than the typical Justice Yeldham solo massacre, the combination of his breath, the piece of glass and a chain of distortion pedals sounds almost halfway ‘musical’ when combined as part of the ensemble.

But if Lucas is the ‘face’ of Rice屎Corpse, it’s really Pete that shovels the coal and dictates the changing moods. Perhaps mindful of the awesome reputation of headliners Lightning Bolt, the drummer barely let the intensity drop for a second, delivering a non-stop feast of improvised paradiddle-diddling that only really got soft during one particular passage.

With no actual songs to speak of, the highlight of the set for me was seeing Pete drop one of his sticks. Reaching over immediately to grab a fresh one off the top of the kick drum, the original dropped stick somehow bounced up off one of the drums and miraculously landed back in his hand and he barely even paused to smirk about it. It was one of those moments – bloody amazing. The drummer from Lightning Bolt may have done something equally as amazing, but I wouldn’t know ‘cos I couldn’t really see the bastard. But more on that later…

Up next were Crux, who thrashed up a crusty hardcore hellstorm in front of a loyal partisan crowd. Having recently announced their intention to break up in January, it was a bittersweet moment to see them at the peak of their powers.

Playing through a much bigger PA than they usually get at Maggotville, their sound was heavy and brutal and all that good stuff, although Anna Vo’s vocals could definitely have been lifted in the mix. Not only was she difficult to hear growling over the band’s racket, it was hard to hear her speak between songs. As she quietly explained the meaning behind one number (something about “consent”?!), a rowdy punter called out for her to speak up because he wanted to hear what she had to say. As death stares shot at the dude from all over the room, I momentarily considered backing him up – I thought he actually had a point. But then I decided he was too much of an obnoxious prick and shouldn’t be encouraged any further, so I just sipped beer and banged my head along with everyone else.

As soon as Crux were done the task of moving a load of musical gear and speaker boxes onto the floor began in earnest, as the Lightning Bolt fan boys and girls gathered tightly around the equipment to stake out the best viewing positions. All of them had no doubt been burned at a LB show before.

It’s a bit of a conundrum, this playing on the floor business. I get it that by not playing on a stage the band were initially trying to eliminate the divide between the band and audience. But in light of their current popularity it has the exact opposite effect – that of being even more exclusive and elitist. It creates a distinct culture of haves and have-nots – those that are stood one or two-deep and can therefore see what’s going on, and any of the suckers further back, who get to enjoy the great visual feast of the backs of other people’s heads for the whole show. Not to mention that it promotes unhealthy antagonism amongst the crowd when latecomers suddenly start jostling people’s girlfriends and shit. I fully believe in fighting for ones right to party, but in this instance it seems it could just easily be avoided if the band would get over their own ‘coolness’ and get up on the damn stage. But I digress…

As bassist Brian Gibson took to the non-stage and tooled up for action, drummer/vocalist Brian Chippendale tightened the straps on the leather facemask that houses his vocal mic before ominously clasping on a pair of heavy-duty blue earmuffs.

As anyone who has heard, seen, or felt Lightning Bolt live will attest; their sound blows minds, warps eardrums and turns sphincters inside out. Within about five seconds of starting, more than half the audience had lost 5% of its hearing, with others rushing to the bathroom to get toilet paper to stick in their ears.

Excruciating volume aside, what makes Lightning Bolt so impressive beyond the ability to create a noise louder than a fleet of jumbos is the incredible control both men wield over their instruments. They are ultra-fast, impossibly tight and unapologetically fucking LOUD!

After maybe 15 minutes of being aurally molested while catching only teasing glimpses of the two culprits through the crowd, I eventually retreated to the smoking zone out the back door, where I could hear just as well and see just as much as where I’d been before only with no sweaty people rubbing against me and less chance of a migraine later on.

Right on 11pm closing, Lightning Bolt punched out on the time clock. Punched it so damn hard, in fact, they practically ruined the rest of everyone’s working week.

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Lightning Bolt MySpace: www.myspace.com/lightningboltbrians

Crux MySpace: www.myspace.com/cruxhc

Rice屎Corpse MySpace: www.myspace.com/justiceyeldham